It's Thanksgiving in Canada today - but it's difficult for me to think of turkey and cranberries when it's in the 80's outside. Scratch that, it is never hard to think of cranberries. At this moment my family is gathering to roast, mash, sauce and bake. It's also my nephews 15th birthday and my nieces 1st birthday so it's a triple celebration. How can I fix it so I can go to family events and not live where they live? That is the dilemma of my life.

Not that I'm exactly thrilled with where I'm living right now. I was slowly warming up to the place and then one weekend without a car - and it all comes crashing down again. (I've been practicing my driving, I swear, but still no license so thus, car is at the airport where the only legal driver of this family can claim it on his way back from Mexico). I had several things I wanted to do this weekend - service projects, bike repair, knitting club and a party - but after studying the bus routes and maps it just became frustratingly stupidly impossible. Buses that run for 5 hours on a Saturday - once an hour - and not at all on Sunday. Events taking place in strip malls off busy highways that I can't picture taking a bike onto. Grrr. Even walking has its challenges. It's hot. I'm lumbersome. I did walk into Carrboro to putter around the thrift store, the wool store and the grocery store. The movie matinees I wanted to see were miles away in - fucking! - strip malls. The bike store didn't have the parts I needed. (I am already heartily sick of doing all the shopping I need to do on-line). But the thrift store was having a great sale where I could load up a paper grocery bag with whatever I wanted for $3. I arrived near the end so it was pretty cleared out but sadly for my bookshelves, the kids book section was relatively intact. One giant sack of books later, I realized I'd screwed myself. It was after 4 pm - so no more buses. I'd have to walk home with the heavy book bag so no yarn store or grocery to add to the load. Just a couple of miles of hot residential streets and shifting the bag from hand to hand every few yards. Chanting to myself, "I will live in a real city again, I will".

But here's the trade-off. We found a house. To rent, I hasten to add, not to buy, at least not yet. With me about to quit working for 7 or so months and the whole "how much does a baby cost anyway?" we thought we'd take the next year to get everything in order and budgeted out so we don't end up like um, 30% of Americans, losing their house. But oh, I love the house. 1920's bungalow, Southern style with a gingerbread giant porch and red front door. Replumbed and rewired (enough outlets!) and new closets but still old and charming. 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. A huge kitchen with lots of light. A big backyard with a 200+ year old pecan tree. An attic for storage. All the mod cons I have yet to take for granted like washer and dryer and dishwasher. Thinking about it - yup, it's the first house I'll ever have lived in, let alone one with 3 bedrooms. Close enough to walk to "downtown" Durham - um, if there was much there which I hold out hope that one day there will be. And all for the price of a one bedroom in Portland or a moldy bachelor in Vancouver. Ah, the eternal trade-offs. Won't the so-called creative-class get wind of the bargains to be had here and invade already? Please?

I'm burying my sulks in a load of homework and TCM showings of Douglas Sirk melodramas (were prettier color movies ever shot?- and it's a nice coincidence after the Todd Haynes article in the Sunday magazine today - they featured one of my other favourites Michael Haneke last week so I feel smugly vindicated.)And heck, in another month, I can be inviting people over for turkey and cranberries in my own (sorta) house.